Listening Leaders Archived Edition

April 5, 2006

LISTENING LEADERS LISTENING LEADERS TENACIOUSLY TEST TRUTH

Listening Leaders® tenaciously serve as the ultimate truth testers and seekers.

Finding truth in today’s world is a test that all leaders must absolutely pursue and pass, for there is no acceptable option in a world filled with speakers who thrive on listeners that are not truth seekers and testers. Consider the importance of the simple truth and unquestionable wisdom of Nietzsche when he observed, “On the mountains of truth you can never climb in vain: either you will reach a point higher up today, or you will be training your powers so that you will be able to climb higher tomorrow.”

Viewed from a perspective of healthy skepticism, Listening Leaders® will profit from the truth seeking beliefs of many. For example, there is great clarity in Marquis de Vauvenargues observation, “All men are born truthful and die liars.” In addition, Samuel Butler’s opinion, “I care about truth not for truth’s sake but for my own,” should speak to all listeners. Or consider the words of Mencken who believed, “It is hard to believe that a man is telling the truth when you know you would lie if you were in his place.”

Listening for the truth is an endless task of which effective listeners should never tire. The simple truth is one person’s truth may be another person’s half-truth, or falsehood. The constant listening challenge of separating truths, half-truths, and untruths must never end, for identifying truth lies at the epicenter of listening and leading. Moreover, the task is imperative as aptly captured by Oliver Wendell Holmes when he wrote, “Truth is the breath of life to human society. It is the food of the immortal spirit. Yet a single word of it may kill a man as suddenly as a drop of prussic acid.”

Truth seekers throughout the land deserve unheralded accolades and applause for they lift the importance of truth telling. Of course, the effective listener’s test for truth begins with four steps of thoughtful preparation. Truth testing must include answers to many questions including: 1) What are my truths? 2) Who are the truth tellers in my circle of listening? 3) Who are the non-truth tellers in my circle of listening? 4) What are my tests of truth?

In addition, productive listeners fortify their tenacious testing of truth by methodically determining the primary purpose of every communication. Although the general desire for truth telling may be relatively universal, the requirements for truth testing are substantially greater when the speaker’s purpose of communication is Informative or Persuasive, rather than Phatic or Cathartic. In Informative or Persuasive communication, the test for truth lies at the heart of understanding and evaluating the speaker’s intent, proof, and words. For as William James clarified, “There is no worse lie than the truth misunderstood by those who hear it.”

When listening to Catharsis, it is always wise to remember that one is listening to the truth of another’s pain as they feel it, and therefore, it is true to them. No judgment of truth is called for, nor usually appreciated.

In addition, a great deal of communication intended to Entertain is rooted in falsehoods and non-truths. Suspension for the listener’s search of truth is often required, for as the great yarn-spinner Mark Twain so clearly understood: “Most writers regard the truth as their most valuable possession, and therefore are most economical in its use.” Or, as the entertainer Bette Midler confessed, “I never know how much of what I say is true.”

Last, but certainly not least, Listening Leaders® must determine how they will deal with the non-truth tellers within their listening circles. Will you avoid, dismiss, confront, or dissect and discuss the differences of truth with such speakers? Such decisions hold important implications for all listeners. Avoid the non-truth tellers and miss their rare moments of truth. Dismiss the non-truth tellers and lose the opportunity to develop and refine important skills of detecting and dealing with such behaviour. Confront non-truth tellers and amplify the vigor and volume of non-truths. Ultimately, it is only mutual dissection and discussion of the different perceptions of the truth that holds the potential for win-win communication. For in the immortal words of Henry David Thoreau, “It takes two to speak the truth ─ one to speak, and another to hear.”

LISTENING LEADER KNOWLEDGE NUGGET: Listening Leaders® are tenacious truth-seekers and testers.

Perhaps the importance of engaging in the eternal search for truth that must never end was best expressed in the simple poem, “Truth Never Dies.”

“Truth never dies. The ages come and go. The mountains wear away, the stars retire. Destruction lays earth’s might cities low; And empires, states and dynasties expire; But caught and handed onward by the wise, Truth never dies.”

In this spirit, Golden Circle Listening Leader®, will find counsel in Ella Lyman Cabot’s story “Truth Is Mighty and Will Prevail” based on events described in the Biblical book of Ezra.

Cabot describes how Darius, the King of Persia, listened to three subjects dispute as to what was the strongest thing in the world.

One argued that “Wine is strongest…for it makes fools of even the greatest men. The mightiest king and the most ignorant child are equal when under its power. The sad become gay because of it. It makes all, even the poorest, feel rich.”

The second argued that the King was the strongest for “The King is mighty above all else. If he bids men go to war, they do it. They cross countries and mountains, tear down walls and attack the towers, and, when they have conquered the country they bring all the spoils to the King. In the same way, when the farmer tills his land and reaps again after his sowing, he pays a large share of it to the King as taxes. He is but a single man, but when he orders a person put to death, it is done. When he commands others to be spared, they are saved.”

Then Zorobabel, the third young man spoke in support of the power of truth. “O King, great is truth, and stronger than all things. Wine is wicked, the King is wicked, all the children of men are wicked, and they shall perish. But truth lasts forever. She is always strong; she never dies and is never defeated. With truth there is no respect of persons, and she cannot be bribed. She does the things that are just. She is the strength, kingdom, power, and majesty of all ages. Blessed be the God of truth.”

And thus the people burst out in a great shout: “Great is truth, and mighty above all things.”

Although times change, truths persist. As thoughtful listeners in the various arenas of marriage, home, social, education, work, business, courts, government, church, science, and the courts know, the search for truth will never end.

So transport yourself as a listening truth seeker into the jury box at the Zacarias Moussari death penalty trial and listen carefully. Who is telling the truth about Moussari’s role in the terrorist’s affairs surrounding 9/11? Is it Moussari who periodically changes his story of involvement and then claimed to be the 20th intended hijacker? Or is it his fellow terrorist captives who have testified that Moussari knew nothing? Perhaps Matthew Arnold was correct that “Truth sits upon the lips of dying men.” On the other hand, it is always important to remember the insightful advice of Lord Darling, who reminds us: “Much truth is spoken, that more may be concealed.”

As a Listening Leader®, in the jury box of life how will you separate the truth tellers?

LISTENING LEADER TIP OF THE WEEK: Remain tenacious in testing the truth.

GOLDEN CIRCLE LISTENING LEADERS QUOTES OF THE WEEK:

The truth shall make you free ~ John 8:32
Tell the truth and shame the devil ~ Proverb
Truth is stranger than fiction ~ Proverb
Tell the truth and run ~ Yugoslavian Proverb
It is not the truth that makes man great, but man who makes truth great ~ Confucius
Respect for the truth is an acquired taste ~ Mark Van Doren
You can’t handle the truth ~ Jack Nicholson as Col. Nathan Jessep
If you tell the truth you don’t have to remember anything ~ Mark Twain
The truth is the safest lie ~ Anonymous
As scarce as the truth is, the supply has always been in excess of the demand ~ Josh Billings
There are only two ways of telling the complete truth ─ anonymously and posthumously ~ Thomas Sowell
Plato is dear to me, but dearer still is truth ~ Aristotle
A truth that’s told with bad intent, beats all the lies you can invent ~ William Blake
What I tell you three times is true ~ Lewis Carroll
It is an old maxim of mine that when you have excluded the impossible, whatever remains however improbable, must be the truth ~ Author Conan Doyle
Ethical axioms are found and tested not very differently from the axioms of science. Truth is what stands the test of experience ~ Albert Einstein
It is one thing to show a man that he is in error, and another to put him in possession of truth ~ John Locke
Truth has no special time of its own. It’s hour is now ─ always ~ Albert Schweitzer
When truth is discovered by someone else, it loses something of its attractiveness ~ Alexander Solzhenitsyn
The first casualty when war comes is truth ~ Hiram Johnson 1867-1902
The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. But the opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth ~ Niels Bohr
The truth is more important than the facts ~ Frank Lloyd Wright

A LISTENING LEADER GIGGLE:

Some must believe truth looks better in the light of openness, as many operate from the perspective of, let truth be told.

Most judges pride themselves in engaging in the pursuit of truth. However, a story is told about the behavior of a certain judge in the mining territory of Nevada who had a reputation for probity. In exhibiting his truthfulness, he opened a mining claim case one morning with the following words to the court: “Gentlemen, this court has received from the plaintiff in this case payment of $100,000.00. In addition, the court has received payment of $150,000.00 from the defendant. As I believe in telling the truth, the court has returned $50,000.00 to the defendant and we will now try the case on its merits.”

Apparently, for some, truth has many legs.

A LISTENING LEADERS KUDOS:

Kudos to those who discover irrefutable truths. For example, on this specific day in history, the simple truth illustrates something that will never happen again!

At two minutes and three seconds after 1:00 In the morning, The time and date will be 01:02:03 04/05/06.

WE INVITE YOU TO REGISTER FOR THE NEXT LISTENING LEADERS WORKSHOP WHICH WILL BE HELD IN CENTRAL FLORIDA ON MAY 23, 2006. Limited class size -- enroll early! For brochure, please send an email to RKB@ListeningLeaders.com

SPECIAL ANNOUNCEMENT A special note to our wonderful Subscribers: Beginning with this issue of our Listening Leaders Newsletter, we will move to a Bi-Monthly Publication Schedule. We appreciate the wonderful e-mails, notes, calls, and letters from our thousands of Subscribers who find value in our Newsletter. We continue our Mission “To Advance Listening Leadership Worldwide” and, in truth, the simple reason for this change lies in the time demands of our extremely busy personal and professional lives. Look for us on the 1st and 3rd Wednesday of every month. In the meantime, Listen, Lead On & Make Today Count!

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Listen, Lead On & Make Today Count! – Manny & Rick
__________________________________________________________________

LISTENING LEADERS: THE TEN GOLDEN RULES
TO LISTEN, LEAD & SUCCEED

By Dr. Lyman K. Steil
& Dr. Richard K. Bommelje

Publisher: Beaver’s Pond Press
(ISBN 1-59298-073-2)

A pioneering book that directly connects listening with leadership.Based on more than 50 collective years of work with listening leaders throughout the world, Dr. Steil and Dr. Bommelje have created 10 practical, proven, and priceless rules to enhance everyone's listening and leadership success. Although outstanding leaders are outstanding listeners, most leaders have neglected the development of their listening attitudes, skills and knowledge.

“This is the most significant book ever written on listening and leadership and will profit leaders at all levels in all types of organizations and enterprises.” Dr. Ralph Nichols, Father of the Field of Listening

ORDER YOUR COPY at www.ListeningLeaders.com or www.amazon.com

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