Listening Leaders Archived Edition

May 17, 2006

LISTENING LEADERS LOVE TO LISTEN

Listening Leaders® nurture and celebrate their love to listen day after day, everyday.

Few are the individuals who do not love to be listened to, and thus, are the rich and unending opportunities for leaders who love to listen. In a world where the cares and concerns of many fall on deaf ears, the call for lovers of listening is loud and clear. To paraphrase some old love Proverbs: “All the world loves a listener who loves to listen; Listeners who love to listen make the world go round; Listening lovers will find a way; True listening love never grows old; The way to a man’s heart is through your ears; She who has never loved to listen has never lived.”

“Golden Circle Listening Leaders®” will be pleased to know that May 16 was designated as “I Love to Listen Day” around the world. It is “A day of international celebration of the joy of listening.” Founded by the committed educator, Marva Shand-McIntosh, the “I Love to Listen Day” provides a rich opportunity for encouraging leaders throughout the world to join listeners everywhere who are focused on “listening on purpose.”

Although May 16, 2006 has passed, the opportunity to follow the lead of Marva Shand-McIntosh’s invitation remains. For true Listening Leaders® every day is an “I Love to Listen Day” as all effective listeners constantly listen on purpose and with love. Nevertheless, we love McIntosh’s emphasis, and concur that everyone will profit by focusing on special days that encourage people from all over the world to celebrate and become better listeners.

As Marva notes, “This is not a day for silence.” Rather it is a time to lay the groundwork to create enduring listening traditions. It is a time to make a commitment to improve listening skills. It is a time to reflect and identify your productive and non-productive listening habits. It is a special time to thank those special people in your life who have served you by listening in special ways. It is a time to listen to others in a way in which they will know that you love to listen.

For as Bertrand Russell so aptly said, “Of all the forms of caution, caution in love is perhaps the most fatal to true happiness.”

LISTENING LEADER KNOWLEDGE NUGGET: Listening Leaders® commit to making everyday a day of “I love to listen

Love is practiced and illustrated in many ways, and loving to listen is no exception. Listening Leaders®” prove the point every day by practicing “Stage A” as outlined in our award winning book, “Listening Leaders: Ten Golden Rules to Listen, Lead & Succeed.”

Initially they exhibit their “love to listen” through focused and careful Preparation. First and foremost, they build “Solid Foundations” by focusing on the basic questions: What is leadership? What is Listening? What is Listening Leadership? As “Golden Circle Listening Leader®” Joe Shuster observed, “Building a solid foundation is the critical key in both listening and leading.”

Second, those who truly love to listen, constantly “Explore and Execute A-S-K” as they consciously refine their development of listening attitudes, skills, and knowledge. A love for listening lies at the beating heart of all positive and meaningful attitudes, effective skills, and driving knowledge. In the words of Warton Ong, professional business advisors in Singapore, “Every morning I pray, ‘Lord, when I really care about others, help me to listen, observe, and take care of everyone’s deepest needs.” It is difficult to care, listen, or lead in the absence of love.

Third, Listening Leaders® “Develop Impactful Habits” that are centered on a love of listening. As Chuck Maragos reminds everyone, “Habits are strange. Some are positive and serve us well, and some are negative and do us harm. However, we profit when we remember we entered this world with none, and we will depart with none. As habits form silently, constantly, and relentlessly, their pervasive impacts are often unnoticed. Yet they control our life.” Loving to listen must become a well-honed habit.

Thus, the first three Golden Rules of all Listening Leaders® are pervasive and provide the basic stepping-stones for anyone who chooses to “love to listen.” Follow them and discover the Principles and Practices of loving to listen, today and everyday.

LISTENING LEADER TIP OF THE WEEK: Center your listening and leading around the hub of love.

GOLDEN CIRCLE LISTENING LEADERS QUOTES OF THE WEEK:

What will survive of us is love ~ Philip Larkin
You must always be a-waggle with LOVE ~ D. H. Lawrence
All you need is love ~ John Lennon
My heart shall be thy garden ~ Alice Meynell
All, everything that I understand, I understand only because I love ~ Tolstoy
Love conquers all things ~ Virgil
Love is my religion – I could die for that ~ John Keats

A LISTENING LEADER GIGGLE:

As illustrated by a group of grade school children, loving to listen requires a deep insight into the business of love.

How does love happen between two people?

One of the people has freckles and so he finds somebody else who has freckles too. Andrew, age 6

No one is sure why it happens, but I heard it has something to do with how you smell ... That's why perfume and deodorant are so popular. Mae, age 9

I think you're supposed to get shot with an arrow or something, but the rest of it isn't supposed to be so painful. Manuel, age 8

What is love like?  Like an avalanche where you have to run for your life. John, age 9  If falling in love is anything like learning how to spell, I don't want to do it. It takes too long. Glenn, age 7

Is it important to be handsome or beautiful?  It isn't always just how you look. Look at me. I'm handsome like anything and I haven't got anybody to marry me yet. Brian, age 7  Beauty is skin deep. But how rich you are can last a long time. Christine, age 9

How important is love?  Love is the most important thing in the world, but baseball is pretty good too. Greg, age 8

How do people in love act?  Mooshy ... like puppy dogs ... except puppy dogs don't wag their tails nearly as much. Arnold, age 10  All of a sudden, the people get movies fever so they can sit together in the dark. Sherm, age 8

What do you think about love?  I'm in favor of love as long as it doesn't happen when 'Dinosaurs' is on television. Jill, age 6  Love is foolish ... but I still might try it sometime. Floyd, age 9  Love will find you, even if you are trying to hide from it. I been trying to hide from it since I was five, but the girls keep finding me. Dave, age 8  I'm not rushing into being in love. I'm finding fourth grade hard enough. Regina, age 10

How can you make someone love you?  Tell them that you own a whole bunch of candy stores. Del, age 6  Shake your hips and hope for the best. Camille, age 9  Don't do things like have smelly, green sneakers. You might get attention, but attention ain't the same thing as love. Alonzo, age 9  One way is to take the girl out to eat. Make sure it's something she likes to eat. French-fries usually works for me. Bart, age 9 How can you tell if two adults eating dinner at a restaurant are in love?  Lovers will just be listening to each other and their food will get cold. Bart, age 9  See if the man has lipstick on his face. Sandra, age 7  It's love if they order one of those desserts that are on fire. They like to order those because it's just like how their hearts are --- on fire. Christine, age 9

How can you make love last?  Spend most of your time loving instead of going to work. Dick, age 7  Don't forget your wife's name- that will mess up the love. Erin, age 8  Be a good kisser. It might make your wife forget that you never take out the trash. Dave, age 8

Or maybe they might just learn how to Listen with Love.

A LISTENING LEADERS KUDOS:

Kudos to Marva Shand-McIntosh for her creation of “I Love to Listen Day”. We celebrate Marva’s commitment to advance the love of listening across the globe. For more information check out www.IloveToListen.com

In addition, Kudos to Paul B. Thornton for his focus on the importance of Listening in his new book “Leadership─Best Advice I Ever Got” Thanks for including our advice along with the advice of 137 CEO’s, Coaches, Consultants, Presidents, Professors, Politicians, and Religious Leaders. It is available at www.wingspanpress.com and reinforces the value of loving to listen. Congratulations Paul!

LISTENING LEADERS WORKSHOP: THE NEXT LISTENING LEADERS WORKSHOP WILL BE HELD IN CENTRAL FLORIDA ON MAY 23, 2006. Limited class size -- enroll early! For workshop details and to register go to www.ListeningLeaders.com

BECOME CERTIFIED TO TEACH LISTENING LEADERSHIP IN YOUR ORGANIZATION. For certification details, go to www.ListeningLeaders.com

WE ARE LISTENING and invite your action:

Together, we can change the listening attitudes, skills, and knowledge of leaders throughout the world. We appreciate and invite your assistance in expanding our listening leader’s connections. Eight simple steps in advancing this important movement include:

Learn to love to listen.
Forward this newsletter to your children, grandchildren, friends and colleagues. More important, invite them to Subscribe to the “complimentary and weekly” newsletter by going to www.listeningleaders.com
Send us your listening leader insights, examples and stories.
Start a Listening Leaders Reading and Discussion Group. Invite your Librarian to purchase our Award winning LISTENING LEADER book.
As meeting, conference, and convention attendees spend the bulk of their time listening, please let others know of our availability to Keynote Conventions and customize Listening Leader Workshops.
Invite us to identify specific needs for listening development of leaders in your organizations.
Ask about our proven listening leader training programs and our customized in-house train-the-trainer strategies and our new Certification program.

We can help, we are committed, and we are listening.
Listen, Lead On & Make Today Count! – Manny & Rick
__________________________________________________________________

LISTENING LEADERS: THE TEN GOLDEN RULES
TO LISTEN, LEAD & SUCCEED

By Dr. Lyman K. Steil
& Dr. Richard K. Bommelje

Publisher: Beaver’s Pond Press
(ISBN 1-59298-073-2)

A pioneering book that directly connects listening with leadership.Based on more than 50 collective years of work with listening leaders throughout the world, Dr. Steil and Dr. Bommelje have created 10 practical, proven, and priceless rules to enhance everyone's listening and leadership success. Although outstanding leaders are outstanding listeners, most leaders have neglected the development of their listening attitudes, skills and knowledge.

“This is the most significant book ever written on listening and leadership and will profit leaders at all levels in all types of organizations and enterprises.” Dr. Ralph Nichols, Father of the Field of Listening

ORDER YOUR COPY at www.ListeningLeaders.com or www.amazon.com

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Dr. Lyman K. (Manny) Steil
25 Robb Farm Road
St. Paul, MN 55127
651-483-3597
LKS@ListeningLeaders.com

Dr. Richard K. (Rick) Bommelje
8530 Amber Oak Dr
Orlando, FL 32817
407-679-7280
RKB@ListeningLeaders.com

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