Carole Billingham's Monday Morning Coach for March 19, 2007
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It
appears that I’ve come down with a case of pneumonia and have been ordered
to get some rest. A part of me is grateful for the opportunity to relax
and be cared for by others, but another part of me is worried about not
being productive. In truth, there is nothing on my task list that could
possibly be more important than my health, yet there’s a fearful part of
me that would love to argue that point. Thankfully, I’m too pooped out to
fight with myself.
I do
find it ironic though, that just a couple of weeks ago, I wrote a Monday
Morning Coach where I admitted I was feeling exhausted; and, that in the
past, I waited until I had co-created bronchitis or another ailment before
I’d take the time to rest. I wrote about the importance of listening to
your body and honoring what it is asking of you. Well, quite frankly, I
thought I was listening to my soul, which had been ordering me to bed
early every evening. I listened carefully and honored my body and mind’s
request to pull back a bit. Looks like it wanted more rest than I
realized.
You’ve heard me admit, that as a recovering perfectionist, I can be quite
hard on myself. I’ve also shared that I have come to terms with being far
from perfect and that the kindest (and wisest) thing I can do when I fall
short of my high expectations is to let it go and be forgiving.
So
here I sit in my flannel PJs, snuggled tightly under a fuzzy, fleece
blanket, listening to the soothing whirl of my Vicks humidifier. I’m
exhausted beyond measure and keep wondering: Did I miss this coming? Were
there signs that I ignored? The answer on both counts is no. This is all
the more reason to let myself off the hook and to simply honor what is.
I
know that often Spirit brings unexpected gifts in ways that can surprise
us. I certainly didn’t see this coming, but I am willing to bet there is a
gift here, or perhaps several gifts. As I surrender my thoughts and my
will and focus instead on my body and mind’s need to rest, I have already
found a gift of comfort and peace. As I let go of my need to do things, I
have found a sense of calm within my core that feels quite nice. And
finally, as I focus my awareness on the tightness in my lungs, I find an
awareness and understanding of the importance of each breath. As I slowly
breathe in and out, I allow myself to breathe in Spirit’s blessings and to
breathe in life itself.
I
give thanks for this blessed opportunity to rest and restore my connection
to Spirit and to myself. I feel grateful for the sunny, blue sky outside
my window; I’m thankful for the birds happily jumping from branch to
branch singing their welcome spring songs, and I’m grateful for you and
your presence in my life.
"Monday Morning Coach
never fails to set a positive tone for my day and week. Carole has found a
way to apply the wisdom of the ages to current life styles and choices,
which produces strength of character and direction in her clients. She can
do this from her experience, but also because she knows how to do it for
herself."
- Anne S. Buttner, Writer, Estes Park, CO
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