~~~~ Notes from Nancy ~~~~
Creating the Life You Want
September, 2005

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Starting today! Teleclasses, group coaching, mentoring, and another program at Wharton, lots of opportunities to get support in having more of the life you want. If you don't usually read the announcements you may want to today!

Warmly,
Nancy

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"When you see a worthy person, endeavor to emulate him, when you see an unworthy person, then examine your inner self."
~ Confucius

"Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves."
~ Carl Jung

"The things we often hate most in others is something we have disowned in ourselves that we are not yet strong enough to face."
~ Julia Cameron
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In the beginning of the book "The 55 Concepts" it says that life is simple, it is we that complicate it. I can buy that. What I had difficulty buying is the first concept: "Anything that bothers you is your issue."

How could that be? Wouldn't my life be easier if other people would just see the error of their ways? Certainly what bothered me about others bothered everyone, (though I found this not to always be true). Besides, if this concept were true it would take work to change myself! It would be so much easier to show others how to change to meet my needs (even though I knew it never worked)!

I did see the truth of this concept in clients and friends. The woman who complained that her mother didn't respect her while she ignored every request her mother made. The man who was indignant about customers who paid late, yet admitted he ignored his debts. Some who railed about slow response time were the same people who never returned a phone call or e-mail. Sometimes it was the opposite side of the coin. The husband who hated dependent women yet insisted his wife not go back to school or work and that she should live on the allowance he gave her.

It was much more difficult to see it in me. Oh yes, sometimes I realized when I complained my husband wasn't listening, I wasn't listening either. And when someone else's gossip bothered me there was somewhere I had said more than I should have. But there were lots of things that I was convinced would absolutely improve if only the other person would change!

For instance when I noticed I didn't like it when my sister criticizing something in my house I decided to put up a boundary. "Tell me what you like about my house, not what you don't like." I said. My sister (who fortunately read the same book) started laughing. She said: "I was about to tell you the same thing about you and my house."

Part of me couldn't believe that I criticized! After all she asked for my opinion and I gave it (or did she?). The clincher was when my husband chimed in: "You do it to me too." Sadly that one I couldn't even begin to deny.

Believing others should change is easy. Believing I have to change is not. Yet when I truly take it to heart I realize I have an incredible power: that as I change, the behavior of others stops bothering me. I don't have to do anything about them. I just have to do my own work.

I'm sure you don't fully believe me (I didn't believe it either in the beginning). But I challenge you to spend one week writing out everything that bothers you in detail on one side of a page, at the end of the week go back and read it. Set the intention to be very honest with yourself, then on the other side of the page begin to write where this is, or could be true of you, in any way. (Be really honest! You can tear it up when you're done. No one else has to see it)!

If you can't do it yourself find a friend you can trust. Share with him or her what bugs you and ask where its true of you. You may be surprised! If you do this honestly you will begin to realize that you have more power and control in your life than you ever believed possible (after you get over the annoyance of having to change that is)!

To purchase a copy of the book "The 55 Concepts" go to www.metaphysicalmentoring.com.

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Upcoming Open Events & Possibilities

Introductory Mentoring Sessions
If you're not satisfied with the way life is working for you,
if you feel there must be something more,
if you're ready for life to get better - call.
All of September 1/2 hour of mentoring for $50, by phone
e-mail nancy@nancybaker.net to schedule
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Introduction to "The Concepts, A Guide to Conscious Living"
Free intro call Monday, September 12th, 8PM EDT
call 1-641-297-5400 access code 82005
There is no charge for this call except what you long distance
company charges you to call St. Mary's, IA
Course:
6 one hour sessions, 8PM EDT
September 26, October 10, 24, November 7, 21, December 5
Cost: $150 plus purchase of book & cards ($24)
Book and cards free with early registration & full payment
by Thursday, September 15. Register by e-mailing nancy@nancybaker.net
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Group Coaching
Free intro call Monday, September 12th, 9PM EDT
call 1-641-297-5400 access code 82005
There is no charge for this call except what you long distance
company charges you to call St. Mary's, IA
Several people have mentioned that individual coaching was out
of their budget at this time or that they would like to have group
coaching. Group coaching is a way to get twice the time for half
the price with the added benefit of having others to brainstorm
with and realize that: "if she can do it, so can you."
Starts September 26 at 9PM EDT. Two 1 hour sessions a
month after September. Cost: $200/month. (September $100)
register by e-mailing nancy@nancybaker.net
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Wharton Women's Network Event - Coaching & You
Monday, October 17, 5:30PM to 9PM
Conshohocken Marriott
111 Crawford Ave, Conshohocken, PA 19428
$45 members, $50 non-members
To register go to www.whartonclub.org/events.html
Join some of the top coaches in the area as they share
their skills to show you how to have the life you want.
Complimentary coaching sessions included.
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Nancy lives outside of Philadelphia with husband Ed and cat Bear.
She is a available for personal consultation, coaching and mentoring
(by phone or in person), article writing, speeches, keynote
presentations, and workshops for individuals, groups, and
organizations world wide.
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Life is a journey that's taken one step at a time.
You can live the life you want - believe it.
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