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When was the last time you got a neck rub, or gave one? Remember how good it felt? Hold that thought and read on. On the first night of a recent Relax and Renew weekend at Kripalu Center for Yoga and Health, about 30 men and women showed for a massage workshop with Peggy Schjeldahl, director of Kripalu bodywork training at the Center. Many of us had come straight from work, fighting Friday traffic to get up to the Berkshires, and the weariness was evident in people's postures and the expressions on their faces. As we entered, we were given a one-page handout including a photocopied image and a brief description of the following event. Newborn twin girls had been placed in adjoining incubators in a hospital nursery. One twin was strong and healthy, the other underweight and fighting for her life. A neonatal nurse went against hospital rules and placed the babies face to face in a single incubator. Some time later, when an attending nurse checked the babies, she saw what we did when we looked at the image: in response to some instinct we don't fully understand, the healthier twin had somehow gotten her arm around her sister in a kind of embrace. The smaller, weaker baby's heart rate stabilized and her temperature rose to normal. As this suggests, touch is more than the trimmings; it's the main course. It is survival itself. Scientists have always known this. Touch, says neurologist Saul Schanberg, is "ten times stronger than verbal or emotional contact and it affects damn near everything we do...if touch didn't feel good, there'd be no species, parenthood or survival. A mother wouldn't touch her baby in the right way unless the mother felt pleasure doing it. If we didn't like the feel of touching and patting one another, we wouldn't have had sex. We forget that touch is not only basic to our species, but the key to it." For more on this subject, read Diane Ackerman's classic The Natural History of the Senses (Random House, 1990) from which this is quoted. Peggy started the workshop with an ice-breaker. She asked us to stand in a circle facing in the same direction, then place our hands lightly on the shoulders of the person in front of us. We then closed our eyes, focused on our breathing, and began simultaneously to give and receive a shoulder and neck massage. As you might expect, there was some shuffling and nervous laughter at first. But as the group relaxed into the experience, the room grew quiet enough for breathing to become audible. We were instructed to begin synchronizing our own breath with the person we were massaging. Eventually, of course, the whole circle breathed as one, tension disappeared. It was magical. After about 10 minutes, when we turned around to face in the other direction and begin the process anew, everyone was smiling. Touch is our first experience of the world and some say, our last. It is the one sense that involves our entire body, which may be why touch has more taboos attached to it than any other of our senses, beginning with the first "Don't touch!" of our childhood. Overtime, for all kinds of reasons, we may develop fear and discomfort with physical contact that renders us literally untouchable. We all know people who settle for a quick handshake or air-kiss while others are more the bear-hugging, loud smack on both cheeks variety. Sometimes one's culture determines the behavior; sometimes it's what one grew up with that dictates what is and is not acceptable. The good news is, we can learn to want what is good for us, and with some conscious effort, we can make sure we get at least our minimum daily requirement. Although the workshop covered specific massage techniques, this was the underlying message. After the circle exercise, we split up into groups of three to practice on the head and feet of our partners, the four basic moves: glide, squeeze, press and a final flourish -- something memorable, like tugging, shaking, brushing off, percussion or simply resting the hands on the body. Peggy and several program assistants moved among the groups demonstrating, observing and encouraging. For the remaining hour and a half, a comfortable, meditative silence descended on the room. Afterwards, we came back into the circle and shared whatever we wished about the experience - a typical "integration" at Kripalu. We concluded by taking a pledge to "squeeze and be squeezed" lovingly and often. The truth is, in a massage workshop and a great many other things in life (rocket science and brain surgery two possible exceptions), technique is less important than the desire to learn and the resolve to practice. And while a whole body massage by a professional can be an extraordinary experience, it doesn't take more than a neck rub to confirm the value of touching and being touched on a regular basis. You can just feel it. BOOKSITE Are you longing to be published? Is there a potential blockbuster lurking in your closet? If do-it-yourself projects makes your heart beat faster, here's something that might do the same: Print On Demand, the new wave in self-publishing, AKA, author-initiated publishing that skirts the usual 'first book' problems of getting the attention of big name publishers or finding an agent who'll even return your calls. We know at least one savvy conventional printer who is betting on POD big time. Here's how it works. You send a "camera-ready" manuscript - that is, edited, copyedited and proofed - to any one of a number of print on demand houses (see below), drop a few coin (about $200 and North), select from some standard options for the cover, and about four to six months later, you have a book to sell on your website and other online outlets or from the back of your pickup, if you're so inclined. As in any book deal, royalties are shared with the publisher. Proponents of POD like it because, 1. you get to control the content and the marketing (typically, this falls on your shoulders anyway) and 2. you get to keep more of the money.
Unlike so-called 'vanity' or 'subsidy' publishing, the book itself remains "virtual" on the site of the publisher until someone orders a copy. Bottom line: you sell it, they print and mail it. Mario Monti's A Directory of Diners (now in its second edition) and Sonia Pressman Fuentes' Eat First--You Don't Know What They'll Give You,The Adventures of an Immigrant Family and Their Feminist Daughter were published this way and are available online via Amazon and Barnes and Noble right along side Tom Clancy's latest potboiler. See their stories, www.2young2retire.org/mariomonti.htm and www.2young2retire.org/soniafuentes.htm. Talk about leveling the playing field! Because there is no warehousing of unsold books, it's good for the environment, too. (Not so good for Daedalus and other "secondary book" sellers.) Self-publishing is great way to get the attention of a mainstream publisher. We've come across a fair amount of anecdotal evidence that this strategy works. And then there's Richard Bolles' What Color is Your Parachute (now in its umpteenth edition), a one-man industry which began life as a self-published book, and a couple of dozen others.
We had our own brush with publishing fame and fortune (maybe) just weeks ago, but the price was too high, and we now investigating the best POD outlet for our book. Many thanks to our author friends who offered their good counsel in a difficult time: Jeff Berner (see www.2young2retire.org/columnists.htm), Rita Golden Gelman, Bob Griffiths, George Kinder, Daniel Pink, Susanna Rich, and Jerry Sweitzer. Buy their books!
Ready to get uppity about publishing? Here are some POD sites to explore: www.ipublish.com; www.1stbooks.com; www.xlibris.com; www.greatunpublished.com Let us know if you have other favorites, howard@2young2retire.org
POTPOURRI * Tim Tingle has been a successful entrepreneur, but at heart he has always been a storyteller. In fact, stories were one of the tools upon which he built his business. Now he tells stories full time. Catch his at: www.2young2retire.org/timtingle.htm * Here's a shameless plug for the Rolling Thunder Downhome Democracy Tour. What is it? "It's a county fair with guts. A revival with a reason. A concert with consciousness. A festival with funk and function. The Rolling Thunder Down-Home Democracy Tour reawakens a great American tradition of asserting the power of regular people to fight for their rights; throws in some enlightening education, soul-stirring music, mouth-watering food and drink; tops it off with a good jolt of Jim Hightower wit and wisdom, plus invigorating insight from firebrand speakers ranging from Jesse Jackson Jr. to Barbara Ehrenreich, and shazam! It creates a thunderstorm of motivated minds and bodies demanding our democracy back from the greedheads and boneheads who have taken it hostage." Coming this summer to your area: http://www.rollingthundertour.org/ * Stock Market gyrations and the latest on Enron costing you peace of mind? Let's focus on some really scary statistics that deserve equal attention now. For your consideration. 1. Global warming is for real and we Americans are a big part of the problem. Right now, says the Global and Regional Air and Energy Program, the U.S. releases about 40,000 pounds of carbon dioxide per person each year. If we can reduce energy use enough to lower greenhouse gas emissions by about 2% a year, in ten years we will "lose" about 7000 pounds of carbon dioxide emissions per person. For 20 simple steps that can cut your annual emissions of carbon dioxide, click here. http://www.environmentaldefense.org/documents/392_20%20Simple%20Steps.htm 2. Show us the money. So far in 2002, the financial services sector has contributed nearly $95 million in soft money, PAC and individual contributions to federal parties and candidates, more than half to Republicans. More money in politics data at http://www.opensecrets.org/, the website of The Center for Responsive Politics 3. Maybe given the above, we shouldn't be that surprised by the following. One in five Americans suffers from anxiety, depression or other forms of mental illness, costing about $18B in prescription drugs like Prozac, talk therapy, hospitalization or rehab. Who pays the bill? We all do. What can be done? As Albert Einstein reminded us, the consciousness that created the problem cannot be the same consciousness that solves it. Your thoughts and ideas to: howard@2young2retire.com * Perhaps, as John Donne said, no man is an island, yet each of us is a world. That is one of the ideas behind the Save One Person/Save the World campaign motivated by the events of 9/11 and created by New York television veteran, Lauren Finkelstein, and Rabbi Simon Jacobson, founder of the Meaningful Life Center, a non-sectarian, non-denominational center for spiritual growth. Take a look: http://www.saveoneperson.org/ * The majority of children don't have goals or think they can make a difference in the world, according to a national survey of American children commissioned by Target Stores and the Tiger Woods Foundation. Seeking to make a difference, they have partnered to create an educational youth program called Start Something aimed at children 8-17. Help your children and theirs find out more: www.target.com or 1-800-316-6142 * Can leadership for challenging times be learned? The first Summer Leadership Institute believes it can. On July 14, it will offer a program at Southern Oregon University in Ashland "designed to define and create a new kind of leader: a leader who is also a Social Artist." For further information contact Bridget at (541) 488-1200 : email Bridgetthebrit@aol.com or Fonda at (352) 621-6687 : email Fondajoyce@aol.com * Coolest jobs on Earth? You be the judge. Whatever the outcome, this site is worth a visit for opening your mind to the possibilities. If you can tear yourself away in less than 60 second, you are a better person than we are. Even if you're not currently in the job market, this is a place to stop, perchance to dream. http://www.jobmonkey.com/main/index.html * A poem a day keeps the willies away. Classics and contemporary poems. Go to http://www.topica.com/lists/dailypoem/?cid=392 to join the e-list. Yeah, the advertising is a pain, but you know what to do about that. * Literature in a nutshell. The library in your PC. For those frugal bookworms among you, here's a gift: http://www.bibliomania.com/ Warning: this site is habit-forming. A subscriber responds about hearing aids: "Over the past several years, I have met a number of elderly (70's & 80's) people who have been sold in-the- ear aids for as much as $1,000.00 EACH and they do not use them. By that age they do not have the dexterity to use the tiny controls, change the tiny batteries or even insert and retrieve the aids from their ears. They are not properly coached or trained to accept the extraneous sounds that you and I understand and are willing to trade off for the wonderful benefits...On the point of cost--Why when a complete computer can be built and sold for under a thousand dollars or a very complex calculator or a wristwatch with time, alarm and a calculator, for five to twenty five dollars, are hearing aids so high priced?...It is likely that your communication is with folks below the age to which too many of these over-priced aids have been sold. However, while 2y2r people might not be as concerned about cost they may very well be dealing with their parents' hearing problems and may have some thoughts." On Ageism in Advertising: "Hi 2Young2Retire Friends! Thanks for your last great newsletter. I especially liked your article on Ageism in Advertising: There is more truth than poetry in that one!! One example (at least it's an important one for me), TV programs. If they don't have young hard-bodies smashing and maiming each other the major networks dump the program. Two of my favorite shows are "The Education of Max Bickford" and "First Monday". These two programs will be taken off next season (according to my newspaper). They are the few intelligent programs left with mature people in the leads, and they are being replaced by inane sitcoms! Maybe the keyword here is "intelligent". More and more I am turning to non-network TV so I will be less and less exposed to their commercial ads." Opportunity from a 2y2r visitor: "What a great web page and service. Thanks so very much. My husband and I live in Sonoma County, CA in the wine country close to the Russian River. We share our 4500 square foot home with six foster teenage girls. Our 1800 square foot living space is upstairs and it is completely furnished and private. The girls live downstairs. We have a woman in her 60's who lives in the garden apartment downstairs and does the grocery shopping and prepares dinner for all of us Monday-Friday. "Each summer, we look for a retired couple who want to move into our home, while we leave for the summer to backpack and travel. We need a couple who would appreciate the experience of parenting our 6 teens for the summer while enjoying the beauty of our home and Sonoma County. The teens attend summer school 8AM-2PM. We are responsible for parenting them Monday - Friday. On the weekends, another couple takes over. This opportunity involves free room and board in a beautiful home and place for the summer, a salary, weekends off and the opportunity to make a difference." Contact: Bethann McIntosh-King
jp4ba@aol.com
Until next time, all the best,
Marika and Howard Stone
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