Dear Friends,

I did a TAT session on myself and, because it relates so well to the upcoming workshop on Weight Loss and Weight Loss Maintenance that is part of the Annual Symposium at the end of this month, I wanted to share it with you today.

It became clear to me that I couldn't stand up for myself with certain types of people and also that my guts felt weak.

I did TAT on:

"Everything that led up to my guts being weak and out of contact with the rest of my body and that I can't stand up for myself happened" as Step One.

I went through the Steps and got to the ones about forgiveness. At that point, I was struck with the awareness that I had injured others so that I could eat. I did TAT with the intention:

"I apologize to everyone I injured so that I could eat."

I felt a history throughout my being (probably related to many generations) of injuring others so that I could eat and feed my own greed for "more". That feeling of "me" and "mine" rested deeply in my gut. I needed to do TAT about "I can never forgive myself for this" and then the opposite, "It's not true that I can never forgive myself for this". After that, I was able to do TAT with the thought "I forgive myself for my ignorance and selfishness". I felt so ashamed for having injured others so that I could eat. I felt I had to have conversations with those people, so I sat in the Pose and did that.

I then did TAT with "I apologize to everyone I injured related to food, money and the feeling of 'mine'": they were all knotted together in my guts.

Lots of gurgling in my guts and stretching my torso happened along with this process.

There is a sense of resting in grace now, even my guts. Before, the sense of grabbing was present for me and not allowing me to relax into grace. There is now a happy gratefulness filling me.

In the last two years I have taken five workshops with Tapas, including the Inner Life Retreat, and each one was better than the last. I can't say enough about my experience. In her workshops, Tapas creates a safe and sacred container in which cores issues can be released. I have experienced each workshop as a powerful conduit for positive change. The release of old limiting beliefs has been profound! My life is radically different. I'm much happier and more relaxed, I take things less personally and have a greater capacity to ask for and receive what I want or need.

One particular workshop experience stands out for me. Last year Tapas did some group work about our relationship to money. At the time I would have characterize my relationship as being one of worry and concern, a fear of not having enough. I was never really able to fully enjoy what I had. This pattern is very strong in my family and I attached a certain significance to it that kept me stuck. I had previously worked with this issue without much success. Now I feel relaxed and calm, rather than tight and grasping. My actual monetary flow has gone up and down however my ability to enjoy it has only increased. The fear I felt has been replaced with a flow of abundance in my life that seems to blossom more fully over time. More importantly to me I feel more connected to the pipeline of abundance, my own divinity. I have great respect and appreciation for Tapas and the work she does. I would encourage any one who wants to experience more freedom and ease in their life to spend time in a TAT retreat or workshop.